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Dear Vicks: I’m in love with my best friend and I don’t know what to do

KANIKA SINGH RATHORE, 06/11/202506/11/2025

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Dear wicks,

I’ve fallen completely in love with a friend of mine – in fact she’s my closest friend – and don’t know what to do. he broke up with her Friend A few months ago, and since then we have become even closer than before. I know it’s very early, considering she’s still grieving her Breakage And I’m giving her a shoulder to cry on, but do I tell her how I really feel now – or wait?

Whenever I see her at bedtime (at her suggestion), or on nights when we just sit on the couch and cuddle, I become even more infatuated. I can’t help but think that we are perfect for each other. But she seems to have put me in a box – she clearly says that she has not got over her ex-husband. But I think she might be just being shy. I don’t want any of us to miss the opportunity for something that could be so great.

I’m desperate to tell her how I feel, but my other friends say I shouldn’t risk ruining it friendshipI don’t know if I can hold it in much longer. It seems like it’s a big secret. What should I do?

loving one

dear lover,

Your message made me sigh – in a romantic, mournful way. I can really feel your longing through the page. Even more than that – your wish. But I would be very blunt and very blunt and say that though I believe friendship is a great foundation for a romantic relationship. relationship – In fact, studies show The longevity of a partnership may depend on the strength of the friendship between two people – it seems like a case of the right person and the very wrong timing.

She’s said herself that she hasn’t yet gotten over her ex – and I’m afraid you need to hear that. If you speak now, you are speaking for yourself: and I understand; Living in an unrequited (or unrequited) love can feel like torture. You can’t see the world straight without it. But this is not exactly the right time.

Think of it this way: If you hit your shot too early, you risk losing her – she may even see it as a betrayal. This is because right now, he trusts you. She feels close to you, you’ve given her a shoulder to cry on and she trusts you with her broken heart and her emotions. If you now “violate” that unspoken code and bring your emotions into it – At a time when he, clearly, is not ready – You risk breaking the bond between you completely. She may also see it as you taking advantage of her fragile heart.

But, take courage – because I’m not suggesting you hide your feelings forever. Just for a while, until she (and it should be her) tells you that she has recovered. focus on construction friendship and solid foundation You’ll be grateful later when things turn romantic.

To make it easier for you, I’ll take a step back – At least in terms of your limitations. No more confusing sleep, no more hugs. Protect yourself from getting hurt too – as much as you instinctively want to protect him.

she may be giving up mixed signals Because she is missing her ex and his closeness relationshipOr he may also have true feelings for you. I doubt the latter, but I want you to respect her space to grieve and put her first. If only for a while. Then, in a few months, ask her how she feels about her ex. If she clearly says she’s over it and feels ready to move on, tell her how you feel. But wait for your time. There’s no point rushing into a good thing and putting it at risk.

Do you have a concern you would like to raise anonymously with Dear Wicks? Issues related to love, relationships, family and work? Email dearvix@independent.co.uk

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