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British TV and radio presenter Ore Oduba talks about his 30-year battle obscene Addiction publicly for the first time in the hope that his struggle might help others.
Oduba, 39, best known for winning Strictly Come Dancing in 2016, spoke on Paul C Brunson’s We Need to Talk podcast, detailing how she was first introduced to porn at the age of nine and how it “destroyed” her life.
The father of two shared that he was willing to break his silence on the topic to help guide his children and others who are struggling.
“A year and a half ago I was able to get rid of an addiction that had plagued me for almost 30 years,” Oduba told the podcast host. “It was destroying my life from the inside out, but I was experiencing it as a reaction to a lot of trauma from a very young age.”
He also talked about the stigma associated with drug addiction.
Oduba said, “I became a master masker. I had to keep it cool.” “That’s the problem with this type of addiction that even I could understand at 10 years old…It’s a shame.”
Porn addiction is still largely taboo and widely misunderstood, so we contacted some experts To find out what is the most common symptoms And when it’s time to ask for help.
What is porn addiction?
“In today’s digital age, access to pornography has never been easier,” says Alex Warden, an addiction therapist who supports patients at Priory Hospital Chelmsford. “For some people, it remains a casual activity, but for others, it can develop into a compulsive behavior that affects their mental health, relationships and overall well-being.
” Porn addiction refers to a compulsive or uncontrolled desire to view pornography, even when it has negative consequences.”
Paula Hall, accredited BACP sex and relationship psychotherapist and founder of Pivotal Recovery, agrees and says it’s often referred to as a spectrum disorder.
“On one end it’s recreational, causing no problems, then in the middle there’s more problematic use, and then you have addictive or compulsive use on the other end of the spectrum,” Hall explains.
What are some common symptoms of porn addiction to look out for?
Warden explains that it’s not necessarily how often someone watches porn, but how it affects their life.
He says, “When watching becomes a means of coping with stress, loneliness or low mood – and begins to interfere with relationships, work or self-esteem – it may be a sign of addiction patterns.”
Here are six common signs to look out for…
1. Lose control
“A common indicator of increasing porn addiction includes feeling unable to reduce or stop consumption despite wanting to,” Warden highlights.
2. Tolerance
“Requiring more frequent or excessive amounts of the substance to get the same effect can also be a leading indicator of addiction,” Warden says.
Hall agrees and says: “For some people, they see an increase in terms of content and start to see images and content that are more and more innovative.”
3. Neglecting responsibilities
“Missing work, study or social obligations due to pornography use is another red flag,” says Warden.
4. Emotional distress
“Experiencing guilt, shame, anxiety or low self-esteem after watching may also be a sign of an addiction,” says Warden.
5. Relationship tension
” Porn addiction can cause someone to become secretive, isolated, or lose interest in real intimacy,” says Warden.
6. Using porn to cope
“Turning to pornography to manage sadness, stress, or boredom is another common sign,” says Warden.
Why is this behavior worrying?
Porn addiction can have both mental and physical consequences.
“Mentally, this often leads to guilt, anxiety, and loneliness,” Warden explains. “This can distort perceptions of intimacy and lead to unrealistic expectations about sex and relationships.
“Physiologically, some people experience sexual dysfunction, reduced arousal in actual encounters, or insensitivity to normal sexual stimuli. Over time, the brain’s reward pathways adapt to this higher level of arousal, making everyday experiences seem less rewarding.”
Why are so many people afraid to seek help about this type of addiction?
“Many people are hesitant to ask for help because they feel deep shame or fear being judged,” Warden says. “Sexual topics are often taboo, and individuals may worry that admitting to conflict will cause them to be labeled a “pervert” or “broken.”
“In fact, compulsive porn use is a behavioral issue rooted in emotional regulation, not a moral failure. Breaking the silence and looking at it through a mental health lens is the first step toward treatment.”
When should someone seek professional help with this?
Warden advises, “If pornography use feels out of control, interferes with daily life, or causes emotional or relational distress, professional help should be considered.” “Ignoring the issue can worsen isolation, anxiety, and relationship difficulties. Seeking therapy early before patterns become deeply entrenched can restore balance and self-control.”
Hall agrees and says: “Don’t wait until you’re truly addicted, as soon as you start worrying about your porn use, that’s the time to reach out for help. On the Pivotal Recovery site, we have a ‘Are you an addict?’ “Assessment tools that can help.”
Is there any therapy/treatment that can help?
Warden says, “Several therapeutic approaches can support recovery, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) that can help identify thoughts and triggers that maintain compulsive use, and trauma-informed therapy that explores the deep emotional or relational wounds behind the behavior.”
When looking for a therapist it is important to look for relevant expertise and qualifications.
“I would always recommend that people make sure they are using someone who is an expert and trained in this area,” Hall advises.
Group therapy and support groups may also be useful.
“They can help provide accountability and reduce shame through shared experiences,” Warden says.
Additionally, mindfulness-based interventions and medication are sometimes recommended.
“Mindfulness-based interventions can help teach self-awareness and emotional regulation, and in some cases medication can assist if underlying anxiety, depression or impulse control problems are present,” Warden says.
How can partners and family members support a loved one going through this?
“Partners and family members can play an essential role in recovery by encouraging open, honest dialogue without blame and by educating themselves about addiction and recovery,” Warden says. “Support works best when it combines empathy with accountability, helping the person feel both understood and responsible for their own development.”